大作文：事例型文：帮助主题-副本

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1、,帮助主题,读写任务 （原文：共3段） You are walking down the street. A woman suddenly screams, Help! A thief! Somebody gets him! and you see a man running away with the womans purse. Would you run after the thief and try to catch him? Most of us will not hesitate to do whatever we can to help our families and frien

2、ds when we are needed, but is it a good idea to do so? Question: 这是一个具体例子吗？ 只是一个引入 ，summary中不需要写出来,There happened an accident like this. An elderly man was waiting for a bus in line for a long time. When the bus came, he was too anxious to get on the bus so that he stepped his own feet and fell on t

3、he ground. On seeing this, a young man ran up to him and wanted to help him get to his feet. To his surprise, the elderly man refused the mans help, and insisted that it was the young man who pushed him on purpose. In the end, the man was forced to go to court and was fined 200 yuan. Also, in some o

4、ther cases, one good turn does not always deserve another. 抓要点：判断： 实际例子 第一种抓要点方式： (when) (where) who, what, result 第二种抓要点方式： 起因， 经过，结果,There is a limit to how much we can do and should help; blind to that line, we may hurt rather than help others in many cases. Weighing up the pros and cons, we some

5、times have to deal with our emergencies before being nice to strangers. 作者对事件的总结 Key words: a limit / not blind/ think carefully,The author tells two example of helping strangers blindly, and want to point out that not to nice to strangers before you do with your emergencies. 请大家打分 0分 The author tel

6、ls two examples (第一段不是例子)of helping strangers blindly, and want to point out that not to nice to strangers (that后面要句子，但是这不是句子；而且，这不是作者的观点)before you do with your emergencies.,Summary: 1) The writer holds a case to tell us that it may bad for us to help strangers and we should be tempy to help the st

7、ranger. 巫佳文 请大家打分 0分 The writer holds a case（要把事件写出来） to tell us that it may bad (这个表达是错的，而且不是作者的观点) for us to help strangers and we should be tempy (?) to help the stranger. （summary 中不要出现we, I）,The passage tells us an example that a man who wanted to help the injured man was accused of hurting the

8、 other man and was punished, which warns/ warning us of the risks of helping strangers. 请大家打分 3分 The passage tells us an example that a man who wanted to help the injured man was accused of hurting the other man(无结果), which warns/ warning us of the risks of helping strangers.（主从不分，主句讲最重要的信息，文章的主要观点）

9、,在保证语法的正确上，用一句话进行连接,By giving the example that a man helped an elderly man (2个人物)who fell on the ground, (起因)but was mistaken as the one causing his falling down（经过） and was finally fined(事件)（结果）, the author warns people of the risks of helping strangers(作者的总结).,1. 陈述帮助陌生人的乐趣和必要性 关键词？ 乐趣和必要性 也就是说必须在

10、该段首句，体现着两个相关词！ 这种类型的题目其实可以翻译为： 解释帮助陌生人的乐趣和必要性的原因 Its happy because Its necessary because 手头范文有举小例子, like giving directions to a lost boy or giving our seats to an elderly lady on a bus. 其实不需要，解释好原因便可。 关键就是开门见山！要老师一眼就能看到你有对点写！,2.以你或你身边的人的故事举例说明盲目帮助陌生人会带来危险。 判断以下例子是否妥当： 1. 泛舟时，有人落水，勇敢救人，结果自己也差点遇难 - 7分

11、写事例型文章，一定要参考所给短文中的例子，尤其例子的起因，经过，结果，要注意对其模仿。 2. 广州司机peng yu 见到老人受伤，送其去医院，结果被人误会 -10分以你或你身边的人的故事，只需将其中人名改为自己的熟人，但是一定要有my friend, my uncle等表明关系的字眼 3. 有人向我借了两块钱，说要还，但是没有还。 - 3分 因为这个例子强调做了某件事，一定是带来危险。所以必须要强调危险性,事例型作文标准架构：记清楚！ 第一点：往往不需要详写，开门见山，首句体现关键词，进行一个原因的解释（一个关键词一分） 第二点，首句体现关键词，首先判断自己身边还别人的例子？ 再认真思考这个

12、例子说明的是什么？以说明的重点来构思例子！ 最后在例子后面添加一句对例子的升华和总结，这个是决定例子高低分的关键。 3. 第三点，开门见山，首句体现关键词 结尾看实际情况： 如果是简单要你号召，就直接倒装句，强调句结尾 但是如果有要你提建议，写做法，分析原因，一定要分点写！至少两点！,By showing the example that a young man helped an elderly man in trouble but was mistaken to be the troublemaker and was finally fined, the author warns us o

13、f the risks of helping strangers and suggests a second thought before reaching out. As an old saying goes, “Give roses to others and the lasting fragrance will remain in your hand.” In terms of individual, when rewarded with a smile on the faces of those helped, well develop a sense of happiness, sa

14、tisfaction and pride inwardly. In terms of the society, it is the encouragement of mutual assistance that helps to constitute a country with a high moral standard. Therefore, I think it is fun and necessary to help others.(点题, 点明关键词) （过渡）However, nowadays professional cheats tend to take advantages

15、of kind, helpful and warm-hearted people, so if we help strangers blindly, we would easily fall into the trap. For instance, （举例）once my grandma gave some money without hesitation to a “beggar” dressed in rags, who lay on the street, hoping to be pitied. But the next week, he was seen to have big di

16、nners in a restaurant. My grandma felt cheated and disappointed and from then on, she became less enthusiastic in helping beggars. (个人层面的后果) If more incidents like this take place, people would gradually become indifferent even when seeing those in real need. （升华到社会层面的弊端）,(过渡)Therefore，in order to l

17、end a proper hand to the people in need and avoid being taken advantage by those cheats, some suggestions should not be ignored. First and foremost, for the strangers, we should be cautious in case we may involve ourselves into trouble when helping them. If necessary, dont hesitate to seek help from

18、 the police. Furthermore, it is advisable to see TV programs like Police Report, so well acquaint ourselves with the various tricks and lies so as to avoid being trapped. To sum up, though sometimes risk exists in giving help to others, we should be still ready to lend a helping hand with the awaren

19、ess of protecting ourselves. Therefore, when helping strangers, look before you leap（三思而后行）.结尾回应， 总结单独成段,No One Dares to Help On a recent Sunday, I was buying groceries in a supermarket when I heard the sound of a car accident. It was close but not very close, so I continued shopping. As I took a ri

20、ght turn on Munadhama Street, I saw a man lying on the ground in a small pool of blood. He wasnt dead. The idea of stopping to help or to take him to a hospital crossed my mind, but I didnt dare. Cars passed without stopping. Pedestrians and shop owners kept doing what they were doing, pretending no

21、thing had happened. I was still looking at the wounded man and blaming myself for not stopping to help. Other shoppers peered at him from a distance, sorrowful and sympathetic, but did nothing. I went on to another grocery store, staying for about five minutes while shopping for tomatoes, onions and

22、 other vegetables. During that time, the man managed to sit up and wave to passing cars. No one stopped. No one did anything. No one lifted a finger. The wounded died alone in the street. The only reaction came from a woman in the grocery store. In a low voice, she said, “My God, bless his soul.” An

23、 offer of aid could have saved the mans life.,Summary： Words: 1. Dare People dare not help People dared not to help= people didnt dare to help. 2. Died 3. 撞车 The car knocked down an old man. He crashed his car (into a wall). A car crash Sentences: The passage tells us a story that the author was sho

24、pping when a car accident happened. a story that 后的从句，必须是文章最核心的内容 The old man might have been saved if he had been offered help. (虚拟意味着观点和情感的表达！Summary里慎用),Passage: Summary 建议打草稿： 一定要检查动词的准确性： 说明文，议论文通常为一般现在时 记叙文：通常用过去时！检查每个动词的时态！ 牢记模板： 叙事summary： 有启示： By telling us a story that （起因+结果）， the speaker

25、/writer/author points out a moral that (寓意) 无启示： After being injured in a car crash,(起因) a man was lying on the ground waving for help.（经过） But because of peoples indifference and inaction, the wounded died alone in the street. （结果）（31） 不要太多，也不要太少！,2以约120个词就“To help or not to help”为主题发表你的看法，并包括如下要点：

26、 （1）读完文章后的感受； 感受就必须有形容词！I was shocked, astonished （2）假设你当时就在事故现场，你是伸出援助之手还是袖手旁观？以你自己亲身经历或虚构的经历说明你的选择； 1. “假设” 意味着什么？ 虚拟 2. “当时”意味着用什么时态？ 过去虚拟 句型？ If I had been there, I would have offered my help. 倒装？ Had I been there, I would have offered my help. 3. 你自己的亲身经历： 例子的重点是什么？要说明什么？ 你的选择：伸出援助之手 那么在例子里就要突出

27、这点！重点描述你的心理活动和如何帮助！ 我被大卡车撞到了，倒在血泊中，结果被救了。 最保险：仿写，加入自己伸出援助之手的情节 （3）你的看法如何,A lending Hand Makes a Better Self and a Better World,After being injured in a car crash,(起因) a man was lying on the ground waving for help.（经过） But because of peoples indifference and inaction, the wounded died alone in the st

28、reet. （结果）（31） I was greatly shocked by the peoples indifferent reaction to this accident. It is outrageous for the onlookers to witness someone dying with folded arms. If inaction like this continued to happen, we would all end up living in a deplorable and miserable world where no love and mutual

29、concern exist. Had I happened to be present at the scene, I would have come to his help instead of looking on with a cold eye.（对应题目要求：假如！） My past experience would prove my resolution to lend a helping hand. The other day when a woman was seen knocked down by a passing car and one of her legs was bl

30、eeding. Just at that time, without hesitation, I called a passer-by for help. I sent the woman to a local clinic with the passer-by at once. At last the woman was saved. （突出主动营救及如何营救）She expressed her great gratitude to us for having helped her. So I might have saved the drivers life had I been ther

31、e and helped him without delay. (回归例子),In my angle, just as an old saying goes, “Give roses to others and the lasting fragrance will remain in your hand.” In terms of individual, when rewarded with a smile on the faces of those helped, well develop a sense of happiness, satisfaction and pride inward

32、ly. In terms of the society, it is the encouragement of mutual assistance that helps to constitute a country with a high moral standard. Therefore, dont hesitate to reach out your lending hand, which helps to make a better self and a better world.,By showing the example that a young man helped an el

33、derly man in trouble but was mistaken to be the troublemaker and was finally fined, the author warns us of the risks of helping strangers and suggests a second thought before reaching out. As an old saying goes, “Give roses to others and the lasting fragrance will remain in your hand.” In terms of i

34、ndividual, when rewarded with a smile on the faces of those helped, well develop a sense of happiness, satisfaction and pride inwardly. In terms of the society, it is the encouragement of mutual assistance that helps to constitute a country with a high moral standard. Therefore, I think it is necess

35、ary to help others.(点题) （过渡）However, nowadays professional cheats tend to take advantages of kind, helpful and warm-hearted people. For instance, （举例）once my grandma gave some money without hesitation to a “beggar” dressed in rags, who lay on the street, hoping to be pitied. But the next week, he wa

36、s seen to have big dinners in a restaurant. My grandma felt cheated and disappointed and from then on, she became less enthusiastic in helping beggars. (个人层面的后果) If more incidents like this take place, people would gradually become indifferent even when seeing those in real need. （升华到社会层面的弊端）,(过渡)Th

37、erefore，in order to lend a proper hand to the people in need and avoid being taken advantage by those cheats, some suggestions should not be ignored. First and foremost, for the strangers, we should be cautious in case we may involve ourselves into trouble when helping them. If necessary, dont hesit

38、ate to seek help from the police. Furthermore, it is advisable to see TV programs like Police Report, so well acquaint ourselves with the various tricks and lies so as to avoid being trapped. To sum up, though sometimes risk exists in giving help to others, we should be still ready to lend a helping

39、 hand with the awareness of protecting ourselves. Therefore, when helping strangers, look before you leap.结尾回应， 总结单独成段,Giving is getting,Summary: 1. 又用 第一人称“I”做主语了 2. 结尾有没有点明寓意？ 要写： warm feeling inside me “Giving is getting”.(但是不要直接拿原文的句子，要改变一下) To give is to get/ getting is from giving. 改词性或者改主被动（2

40、007年高考小作文）,The author saw a poor man looking for something in a rubbish bin when he wanted to throw some heavy food away.(起因) Then he gave the food to the man who was grateful, （经过）which led to the understanding that to give is to get. （结果）（43words）,1) 短文给你的启示 2）用你的经历来说明 “giving is getting” Feel gra

41、teful to sb. for sth.！ Feel eternal gratitude to sb. for sth. Thankful, thankfulness, thanks同上 enlightenment,1) 短文给你的启示 对点写！启示一定要在开头句点明！ 审题！不要把背了的感受，评价，想法那一堆放在这段，题目要求什么就写什么！不要理所当然的就套范文，范文是资料，不是模板！ 2）用你的经历来说明 “giving is getting” 例子的问题：giving=helping?=mutual help? 可以利用但不要套用例子，要根据题目要求来量身订造 互助那篇文章所给的短文,

42、 Giving 道德层次更高一点，所以再次强调 1. 往公益道德角度来写！捐血，地震捐款，帮老人家读书 2. 一定要注意结合所给短文来检验自己的例子！ Giving sth. Unwanted to others but was rewarded with thankfulness and smile. -know the meaning of “giving is getting” 提醒： 1.大多数举例文章应该举的都是正面的例子，除非题目有很明显的要求：请用你一次失败的经历来说明。 2. 如果所给出的短文是寓言类型或者用别的事物来类比人类特征的，注意抽理出故事脉络：起因经过-结果。,应试特

43、别提醒,1. 不能用涂改液!下次点名！ 2. 用0.5的笔来考试！如果笔水很淡或笔有问题，不要拿来考试！ 3. 高分作文，篇幅也很重要，注意看在卷面所做的标记 小作文，字可以大点，清晰点，不要连笔。最后剩两行。 大作文，如果写完例子还有4-5行，留下两行来做总结段，然后就继续抖抖:虚拟，强调，倒装. 4. 答题卡裁剪好，用打洞机打洞放进作文本里,Brief as the story is, it still reveals/illustrates the profound and far-reaching enlightenment that (点明启示)when one gives away

44、 things or help generously, he would be rewarded an unexpected return, which is spiritually comforting and beyond material. （扩展giving is getting）It is by taking the initiative in giving that one can reap the joy and satisfaction from getting.(同义换句型再说一次) Therefore, never could we overlook the crucial

45、 importance of giving away. The following example would prove my point clearly and persuasively. （过渡+总起）After the merciless earthquake struck Wenchuan, our school appealed to us to donate. (背景) While showing deep sympathy to the victims, all my classmates and I were eager to reach out a helping hand

46、. （起因）Not born in a well-off family, I still gave all my board wages without hesitation, as a result of which, I had to have vegetables only for the rest of the month. （经过）Surprisingly, 3 months later, a letter of thanks from the affected area arrived, which lit up my face and filled my heart with w

47、armth and joy. （结果）But for my giving initially, I wouldnt have harvested the gratitude and the joy afterwards. （抖1：虚拟）It was my small act of giving away that helped them out of the abyss of misery and earned myself a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment . （抖2：强调句）（outwardly and inwardly） To put

48、it in a nutshell, examples above reemphasize the meaning of “giving is getting”.（重申题目文眼） Give rose to others and the fragrance will remain in your hand.,Help makes real difference,With the donation of the outer-ears, the life of the boy born without ears became a great success. But the secret that h

49、is mother was the selfless donator was kept until his mothers death. (summary) On reading the story, I was deeply moved by the selfless mother, (承上启下)believing that great love from a mother is the most selfless and powerful emotion in the world. As a consequence, a mother with extraordinary love can

50、 sacrifice anything for her children, even her life, not to mention donating her ears.,However, selfless love not only exists between blood-relations, but can also be found in strangers. Here goes the vivid experience of mine to prove the point. (承上启下)One day, so late did I get up that I missed the

51、school bus. Anxiously, I stood by the roadside and had no alternative but to ask others for help. Seeing my waving hands, a car stopped. I asked the driver whether he was willing to offer me a ride to school. To my surprise, he asked me to get on without hesitation and I arrived at school in time fi

52、nally. Without his timely help, I would not have arrived at school in time. So , it is needless to say that it is the mans timely help that has made a real difference.(对例子的总结) Kindness is a kind of moral excellence our nation always respects. From where I stand, being helpful is being virtuous, and

53、it can definitely benefit both those you help and yourself. Try to help others as much as possible and I cling to the belief that you will gain happiness during the process of your helping others!,读写任务2011年二模题,互助才能共赢,summary,1. 写细节：because the wind can blow the corn pollen from his neighbors fields.

54、 应对：提炼-because both their corn would improve. Blue ribbon-won the competition 2. 偷看了后面的参考范文： A farmer won in a corn competition by sharing his good corn seed with his neighbors. 3. 讨厌的打不死的第一人称！和writter! In the passage the writer uses the story of the award-winning farmer who shares his best corn see

55、d with his neighbours to teach us that we all can benefit when we co-operate and share with each other. 这是范文的summary, 具体到这篇时态 一般过去式或现在时都行，但是一般来说，要是例子的归纳提倡用 过去时态,参考框架：By telling/ showing the story/experience that （起因+结果）, the author told/ warned/ encouraged/ informed us that 框架式的归纳 ： By giving the st

56、ory that an award-winning farmer shares his best seed to his neighbors so as to improve his corn, the author points out the fact that cooperation brings mutual interests. 逻辑显得更加的严谨！,以约120词就“互助才能共赢”的话题进行议论，内容包括： 1. 你对文中故事的看法和感受 2. 进一步说明“互助才能共赢”的道理 两点的意思就是： 每一点都不能太短！ 要加一段总结段！,1. 你对文中故事的看法和感受 看法=观点 感受=

57、心理形容词 因为总共只有两点，要考虑整体比例问题： 不用太长，也不要太短, 5行左右 After reading the story, I firmly subscribe to the farming and cooperation with his neighbors （看法）and I also deeply admire his wisdom（感受） for cooperation makes greater success for everyone.（简单表明原因） After reading the instructive and educational story, I regi

58、ster profound respect for the farmers wisdom of mutual aid. （看法）It is the cooperation that brings the win-win situation. （感受）Leaving me pondering deeply, it has sowed the seed of the significance of cooperation in my inner heart. （再强调）,Words: 1. Register profound respect for 不要随意换词 2. strengthen the

59、 friendship/co-operation/management /education/supervision But： strengthen the significance of？ Emphasize the significance/moral/meaning of 3. message马杀鸡问题-禁用！ 建议：moral /enlightenment,2. 进一步说明“互助才能共赢”的道理 进一步说明：最好用例子+后面总结议论的模式！ 1）故事的选拔问题： 1. 如果不限于自己的经历，最好举名人，公司，国际合作的例子 2. 不宜过于古老，近现代的比较好 3. 不宜过于故事化（动物

60、界合作的例子：蚂蚁，鳄鱼和某鸟的例子），或者不确定性，one day, smith went shopping but he was caught in a fire. 对策：加个官方的前提和背景介绍： A world famous incident happened during a big fire in America. The hero, Smith, one day, was on his way to the mall. . 4. 不能泛泛而谈：比如中国的经济，如果不改革开放，就不怎样。 对策：必须具体化：想当年后来和美国合作，中国大量出口货物帮助美国日益增长的物质需求，大量美元涌

61、进中国帮助经济增长。,2）例子的表述 1. 一定要先简单构思，确定关键词，再下笔，要不然就会有侏儒体例子头重脚轻，重点不突出！ 诚实守信： Make a promise-how to keep promise- keep promise 高度自律： Accept your duty -how to be self-disciplined-be self-disciplined 互助才能共赢： Mutual help-cooperate-both benefited 梳理出主干，背景神马的，一句最多两句就算了，不需要过渡交代合作之各自有多凄惨。 记着好例子的7句法,事例作文句法,第句：过渡+总起

62、 第句：背景（可以有，也可以没有） 第句：起因(矛盾) 第句：经过1 第句：经过2 第句：结果 第句：抖一抖（升华+总结）,关键词多一句话进行突出，强调,三大抖法, 要抖得厉害，精彩，宝石闪闪！,1. 虚拟语气写反面结果：Had it not been for my self-discipline, I wouldnt have succeeded in losing weight. 2. 强调句强调良好结果：It was just by virtue of my self-discipline that I won my friends respect and trust. it is no

63、t my leadership but my self-discipline that enhance my worthy image and guarantee my confidence to lead the team, thus making me a responsible person. 3. 比喻：it is no exaggeration to say that this experience has sowed the seeds of self-discipline and responsibilities in my inner heart and has made it

64、 possible for me to make greater progress in the coming exam. 何斌贤：crane,clam,fishmen,日本地震、核辐射 Take the recent tragedy in Japan for example. The earthquake and tsunami have caused great damage to that country. Most serious is the damage to the nuclear power station that has caused radiation to leak i

65、nto the atmosphere. If other countries had acted selfishly and hadnt helped the Japanese, not only would the local people suffer, but the problems of radiation would spread to affect the rest of us. (虚拟语气) Luckily, many experts from outside Japan came to lend a helping hand, which would hopefully so

66、lve the problem. This will be of benefit not only to the Japanese people, but to the rest of the world as well.,After reading the instructive and educational story, I register profound respect for the farmers wisdom of mutual aid. Leaving me pondering deeply, it has sowed the seed of the significance of cooperation in my inner heart. It is the cooperation that brings the win-win situation. T